The Wheel of Belonging DiagramTonight marks the return of the Houlton Coffeehouse after a two and a half year hiatus. We look forward to see new and old friends once again and experience music and poetry flowing from the stage.
Bertrand Laurence is our feature performer and open-mic starts at 7PM Saturday Night. Our Sunday Service will be in the parlor this week as it was starting to get a bit chilly in the sanctuary.
Dale Holden and I will be leading the service with Dale sharing a short talk titled “The Belongingness of Singing Together.”
Our YouTube service for this week is Part Two of our series on Belonging. You will find the transcript from the talk in today’s support page. Please join us for one of the services this weekend. Have a good week-end everyone.
In Ministry,
Dave
THIS WEEK’S YOUTUBE SERVICE:
HERE IS THE SERVICE LINK FOR THIS WEEK’S YOUTUBE SERVICE
(Please note it won’t be active until 10AM on Sunday morning) The link will be sent out later in the day.
HERE IS THE ZOOM LINK FOR SUNDAY COFFEE HOUR:
David Hutchinson is inviting you to a scheduled Zoom meeting.
Topic: UUHoulton coffee hour and check-inTime: Oct 16, 2022 11:00 AM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meetinghttps://us06web.zoom.us/j/86977816241?pwd=R253ajJyWUdmN3Y0Mnd6RG5BNlNLdz09
Meeting ID: 869 7781 6241Passcode: 880996
Virtual Offering Plate
If you would like to send in your pledge or donation simply drop an envelope in the mail. The address is listed below. You can also send your donation electronically with our new payment system on the church website. Simply go to uuhoulton.org and click “Donate” on the menu and it will explain how the system works. You can set up a regular monthly payment plan or donate in single transactions. Thank you for your generous support!
UU Church of Houlton61 Military StreetHoulton, ME 04730
HOULTON COFFEEHOUSE
October 15, Saturday Evening 7-9PM
The Cup Cafe, 61 Military Street
FEATURE: Bertrand Laurence
It’s been over two and a half years since the Houlton Coffeehouse had its last show (pre-covid), but here we are and it’s time to bring music and performance art back to the stage. Bertrand Laurence is our feature performer for our first night back. Bertrand is a solo guitarist and one of Houlton’s newest local musicians having recently moved to the area from Cambridge, Massachusetts. (See the bio and press releases included below.) We look forward to seeing old friends and new friends back at the coffeehouse.
Open-mic starts at 7PM for aspiring musicians, poets and writers. Come early to sign up and we’ll have the coffee machine on for you…
See you at the Cup!
Feel the buzz…short bio:
Bertrand studied music briefly at Berklee college, sound-art at Mass Art, and finger-style guitar on his own while ruining his parent’s blues , country & folk record collection. Bertrand’s guitar playing evolved from countless hours improvising in public to silent movies, improv’ comedy, and designing sound for movement theatre. Recently moved from Cambridge MA to Houlton, this ex-pat is also an awarded guitar instructor, a dad, and a recovering ex-mime. Expect a range of american styles, and stories of a frenchman surviving in the USA.
“Boston’s French Blues Guitar Wizard with an…imaginative melodic and rhythmic sense.”-Elijah Wald, Boston Globe
“…street tough…with seductive smoothness…” -Scott Alarik, the Boston Globe
Menu
Classic Chicken Stew
Spiced Pumpkin LatteIn Celebration of Music, Poetry and the Arts…
Transcript from Rev. Dave’s talk last week:Belonging
(Part Two)It’s a beautiful fall day and and two men are seated on a park bench enjoying the foliage. One man is a psychiatrist and the other is a lawyer. The psychiatrist asks the lawyer, “What kind of lawyer are you?”“Bankruptcy.”“How much do you charge?”“A hundred dollars for four questions.”“Isn’t that awfully expensive?”“Yes. So what’s your fourth question?”
As some of you may (or may not be aware) I served a two-month jury duty term this summer that just finished up about a week ago. This entailed several lengthy jury selection processes and then sitting on a jury for a case that lasted two weeks. The judge came into the jury room after we had finished the case and expressed his appreciation for our efforts, he confided that it was the longest case he had ever presided over as well. So over the course of two months I spent more time in a court house (both Caribou and Houlton) than I have ever spent in my life. And over the course of two months I spent more time with lawyers and legal support professionals than I ever have in my life as well. Hence, the joke about the lawyer’s four questions isn’t that far off.
But I must say, the court room and the court room culture is a good example of the influence of setting; of how place and environment can shape what occurs and how it occurs in a particular setting.
What we are looking at today in part two of our series on Belonging is something known as “situation-crafting” – creating or shaping a situation, even in seemingly small ways, in order to promote a sense of belonging.
On front of today’s bulletin you will see a diagram that I call “The Wheel of Belonging.”You will find ten tabs on the diagram that identify ten qualities or felt-expressions of belonging; such as invited, welcomed, known, accepted, involved, supported, heard, befriended, needed, present.
Over the course of this series we will be referring to this diagram from time to time and you will see several of these tabs come up again and again. If you’d like to take the “UUHoulton Wheel of Belonging Self-Test” you simply check to see how many of these felt-qualities you have experienced here in this setting.
Here’s how it works. For each tab you score 0, if you have not experienced the quality – 1 if you have experienced the quality intermittently – and 2 if you experience the quality at a sustained level or repeatedly. So your self-test score could range anywhere from zero to twenty.
You can take the test now as we begin the series, you can take it again as we go along and then again at the end. You can take it as many times as you like, there is no charge or fee for the test (no matter how many times you take it).
So back to the courtroom…what I noticed and experienced during my two months of jury duty was the power and effectiveness of “situation-crafting.” On our first day of jury duty orientation the court room was full capacity with approximately 150 people from our jury- pool of 500, a cross-section of citizens from Aroostook County from all age groups and walks of life – many of them wearing casual attire, shorts, sandals, work boots, baseball caps, etc (that would change as time went on)…total silence as we waited for the judge to enter the court room…(running behind schedule, which apparently wasn’t that unusual)
One of the deputy marshals announced no hats on in the courtroom or cell phones and we continued to wait…It had been a very long time since I had been in a room with this many people, in complete silence with absolutely nothing going on. Then the other deputy marshal announced “All rise…” and the judge abruptly walked in, took his seat and said, “Let’s get started.” The first thing the judge did was to express his appreciation for each of us being there and was aware of how inconvenient jury duty might be for many of us. Then we received a crash course in civics 101 and given instructions as to our next assignment. Over the course of two months the situation-crafted court culture provided a stable context for each individual to function in whatever role or duty they had to perform. As this series continues I’ll be sharing more from my courtroom experience from time to time.
The term “situation-crafting” is something that the author Geoffrey Cohen has come up with, not something new, but a re-branding of an older practice. In the years just before World War II and after, it was known as the science of experimental sociology and psychology. One of the proponents of this science was Kurt Lewin, a German Jew who emigrated with his wife, Gertrude, to the United Sates in 1934 shortly after Hitler took power. Lewin teamed up with anthropologist Margaret Mead and other young proteges to research and establish “experimentally created social climates.”
Cohen says, “Rather than just describing and analyzing society as it was, the goal was to use science to create a new and better world – by creating artful situations that unlocked our potential for good, even when society seemed at its worst. Whereas other social sciences were the science of what is, this was the science of what could be – a science not of human nature but of human potential.” And then a key statement as it applies to our topic…
“To understand behavior, we need to understand the dance between the person and the situation.”
“Situation-crafting” has multiple aims; one, creating a stable setting where a sense of belonging is established and secondly, creating a new setting that is inductive to change and transformation. “Situation-crafting” is the science and art of creating space and setting for a sense of belonging and transformation. The title of this chapter, chapter one in the book, is The Potential of the Situation; How Situations Shape Us and How we Can Shape Situations.
In this chapter Cohen highlights Five Vital Resources for doing this:
1. Time
Time or timing. Timing, is often times, everything. Crafting a situation will be most influential when a person is in need of, and ready for, or open to the idea. For example, if someone is just moving to a new area, they are looking for new places and new people to connect with. Or if someone is disillusioned with the current group they are involved with they are more likely to be open to change, to a new group or new ideas. Timing is everything.
2. Participatory Processes
With “situation-crafting” interventions, change is not coerced in an authoritarian way, but is encouraged as a participatory or democratic process of their own change.Real change occurs when it is self-motivated.
3. Reference Groups
The group-culture that you are a part of can assist, support and challenge you as you evolve in your self identity and development. A reference group is a lpgroup of people and values that you can identify with and refer to as you engage in life’s questions. Change groups and there is a new norm (whatever that might be).
4. Self-Affirmations
One of the most important things a group can do for an individual is to affirm the value and worth of the individual. At its best a group provides situational opportunities for people where they can express who they are and to be valued for it. This should not sound unusual for Unitarian Universalists as this is essentially our first principle; to affirm and promote the worth and dignity of each individual. If a person’s self-esteem is shaky, group affirmation can help the cause.
5. New Roles
Membership in a group provides one type of role identity, but other responsibilities and leadership roles can also provide belongingness and expanded identification. These new roles also lead to new life-experience and growth opportunities.
These five resources are essentially psychological or interior, spiritual qualities that are being developed which lead to outer expression and visible results. Change can happen. Potential is always ready and waiting…
Cohen also shares his Triple Ts of situational-crafting:
- Tailoring
- Targeting
- Timing
The right psychological message (tailoring) occurs for just the right person (targeting) at just the right time (Timeliness).
In closing, a short story.
This was years ago, one night in our UU parlor and we were having a book discussion group of some kind. There were about twelve of us and we had a good fire going in the wood stove and it was warm and cozy. We had our chairs lined up in the middle of the room in two rows facing each other as we talked. We were in the middle of our discussion when a woman in her mid thirties walked in and joined us. I didn’t recognize her, but didn’t think anything of it, assuming someone had told her about the group and she had simply showed up. The meeting ended and we were still seated in our chairs chatting a bit and by then we were all curious (me included) as to who was the newcomer? When someone asked, she replied, “Well, I thought I was coming to an AA meeting at first, and then I realized it wasn’t, but it was such an interesting conversation and everyone seemed so nice, I decided to stay. I have never seen a group of people have such a long and thoughtful discussion.”
This is an example of “situation-crafting.”
Although this may be a newish term, it’s something we have conducted as a spiritual community and religious organization in this town for a long time. We attempt to model the shared values and honor the relationships that we have with each other in many and varied ways. I believe this is the most important thing that we do as a community. We may not be perfect and we may be inconsistent at times in doing so, but our aim is to be true to these highest of aspirations. To belong is a continual process and we are still practicing at it. All we ask of anyone is to give it your best effort. And with that, I will stop talking now. I have talked long enough…
The Zen Watchmaker
BY SHERRI POSEY
Sherri Posey is a Buddhist hospital chaplain and professional watchmaker. She reflects on how time’s fleeting nature connects everyone.
For twenty-six years, I’ve been a watchmaker in the luxury timepiece field. Every morning I sit at my bench with my tools laid out and a watch movement ready to be disassembled, cleaned, lubricated, regulated, and reassembled. Lowering the magnifying loupe to my left eye, I select one of my many pairs of tweezers or appropriate-sized screwdrivers and begin to work. I assess how damaged or worn the parts are. Perhaps it’s just the tiniest piece of lint caught between the teeth of a wheel, stopping the whole mechanism. Sometimes I have to replace the entire movement because it’s gotten wet and is now an immovable ball of rust. Other times the job requires putting in a round calendar disk and setting the hands in the center. I look, I listen, I diagnose, and hopefully I fix. Then I move on to the next timepiece.
I have also been a Buddhist hospital chaplain for twelve years. I go to a patient’s hospital room. Before entering, I check the wall next to the door for any special instructions. Then I sanitize my hands, knock on the doorframe, and enter unhurriedly and with consideration for the patient, the roommate, and the space the patient is in. I scan the room, looking at the whiteboard announcing the patient’s name, their doctor, and their evening nurse. I glance at the bedside table with, perhaps, a half-eaten meal, get-well cards, and a cell phone. Family photos on the wall in front of the bed mean the patient has been in the hospital for a while. A small dreamcatcher hanging from a machine that monitors vitals or a laminated prayer card taped to a bedside rail near the head symbolizes hope. I show my badge, introduce myself, and ask if they’re up for a visit. If their answer is yes, I take a seat in the visitor’s chair and—in this time of mask-wearing due to Covid—I smile with my eyes.
“What’s happening for you today?” I ask.
I listen. Maybe they talk about a devastating diagnosis, irritation with staff, disappointment with being back in the hospital yet again, spiritual anxiety, or loneliness. Maybe none of their family or friends want to talk with them about their impending death—no one’s comfortable with that conversation—but they think the chaplain might be. I remain still, attentive. Is meditation wanted or prayer required? Or, is silence and presence desired? I look, I listen, and I don’t try to fix. Then I go on to the next patient or staff member.
A few years ago, I realized that my two professions had run into each other. Or perhaps they’d always matched up, and I hadn’t noticed. Both jobs measure a “passing”—of time or of a life.
When people find out that I’m a watchmaker, they want to talk about time. People wonder where their lives have gone. Did they spend too much time at work and not enough with family and friends? How much time did they give to themselves? Often, they talk about regrets and that there isn’t enough time to accomplish anything now because… time is running out very quickly.
I’ve always relied on my Buddhist practice for my life and work. While it’s great if you meditate every day and “feel Zen” when times are good, it’s when things have collapsed to absolute shit that keeping up with your sitting practice really means something.
A teacher once posed a question in a spiritual-path class that I attended: “What do you want from your practice?” It was a simple enough question, and it made me think of my mother. My mom is an evangelical Christian. She relies on her Christian faith. She’s consistent in good times and bad. I instantly said, “I want what my mother has.”
I didn’t want to be the Buddhist version of a “Black church lady,” but I did want to rely on my Zen Buddhist practice, and I have. As a Black woman during these very racially tense times, I’ve relied on and engaged my practice much more these past few years. It helps me take care of myself and be there for others, especially the POC community.
The more I engage my practice the more I think about the connections between my watchmaking job and being a Buddhist chaplain. Death is not convenient. People often die wearing their watches. So, I’ve handled watches sent in by grieving individuals and families that—through their damage—tell me when (the exact time the watch stopped) and how (from the impact damage and blood) someone died. People never feel they have enough time. They speak about how the passing of time is so fast it’s as if their clock’s hands are spinning round and round. I hear this not just at the hospital, but also at the watch company.
Yet, it’s time that connects all of us, casting its net over everything. I’m not separate from any of my patients or watch clients, and they’re not separate from me. Acknowledging my own times of suffering allows me to acknowledge the suffering (and the joy!) of others. I remember my own suffering when my wife was rushed to the hospital and how in that dark moment, as I was feeling lost, a chaplain came to me.
I still have much to learn and experience. I continue to learn—again and again—that moment to moment, second to second, right here and right now, we are together in suffering and joy.
ABOUT SHERRI POSEY
Rev. Jyakuen Sherrilynn Posey is a watchmaker, interfaith minister, and Buddhist chaplain in the Soto Zen tradition.
Prayer List
For those recovering from COVID-19 in the state of MaineLocal emergency personnel and hospital staffFor our state and national leaders as they respond to the current coronavirus crisisFor those working for social justice and societal change
Pray for peaceful action and democratic process in our nation
The war in Ukraine is now in its eighth month
Prayers for those affected by the flooding in Pakistan
Prayers for those affected by hurricane Fiona in Puerto Rico and the Caribbean
Prayers for those recovering from hurricane Ian in Florida and along parts of the east coast
The Four Limitless Ones Prayer
May all sentient beings enjoy happiness and the root of happiness.
May we be free from suffering and the root of suffering.
May we not be separated from the great happiness devoid of suffering.
May we dwell in the great equanimity free from anger, aggression and exclusion.
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