April 2, 2023
Unitarian Church (alternate view)
Today is the first day of April (all joking aside). Even though we’ve experienced some inconsistent weather of late, I’m hoping that the warm and rainy days of early spring will outnumber the cold ones…
Palm Sunday is this weekend and Rev. Dale Holden is leading the service with Rosalind Morgan supplying special music. The title of Dale’s message is “Holy Week” and we even have palms! We are also celebrating April birthdays during coffee hour.
Our YouTube Channel service for this week is part nine of our series on Belongingness with a summary of key takeaways from Geoffrey Cohen’s book Belonging. Rev. Dave leads the service and the message is titled “How We Can All Create Belonging.” Service notes from the service are included in this week’s support page.
Please join us for one of the services this weekend.
We are in the process of building a list/data base of everyone’s birthday and anniversary in the congregation so we can recognize these special dates each month of the year. We’d also like to include this information in the next church directory which will come out in the Spring. You will find a sign-up list in the coffee room to submit your info.
Have a great weekend!
In Ministry,
Dave
THIS WEEK’S YOUTUBE SERVICE:
HERE IS THE SERVICE LINK FOR THIS WEEK’S YOUTUBE SERVICE
(Please note it won’t be active until 10AM on Sunday morning)
HERE IS THE ZOOM LINK FOR SUNDAY COFFEE HOUR:
Topic: UUHoulton coffee hour & check inTime: Apr 2, 2023 11:00 AM Eastern Time (US and Canada)
Join Zoom Meetinghttps://us06web.zoom.us/j/85971502254?pwd=N2JPTXpsM1lTckd3MUlQWENqbzhOQT09
Meeting ID: 859 7150 2254 Passcode: 311948
Virtual Offering Plate
If you would like to send in your pledge or donation simply drop an envelope in the mail. The address is listed below. You can also send your donation electronically with our new payment system on the church website. Simply go to uuhoulton.org and click “Donate” on the menu and it will explain how the system works. You can set up a regular monthly payment plan or donate in single transactions.
Thank you for your generous support!
UU Church of Houlton, 61 Military Street, Houlton, Maine 04730
Service Notes from this week’s YouTube recording:
“There’s a new telephone hotline in Los Angeles for people in denial. So far no-one has called…”
– quote by George Carlin
As we continue our series on belonging, one of the issues we keep running into is what do we do when we encounter views or perspectives different from our own? Each of us have our own opinion, but are we aware of how that opinion can sometimes limit our connection or relationship to the other person or persons, who happens to have their own take on the topic? To a certain extent, each of us are “in denial” or unaware of our identification to our own views. This is one of the primary goals of Cohen’s book on Belonging, is to help us to become more self-aware of our own perspective, and in doing so, it will help us to be more aware of someone else’s point of view or life experience. All in all, we are not that different from someone else who appears to be so, and our shared values are more similar than we might first realize.
“The power of the situation is a power we all share. To use this power well, we must work at being astute observers of situations. While the research on belonging uncertainty shows how easily belonging can be undermined, the science of situation-crafting shows how empowered we all are to combat that uncertainty in ourselves and in others.”
Situation-crafting has multiple aims; one, creating a stable setting where a sense of belonging is established and secondly, creating a new setting that is inductive to change and transformation. Situation-crafting is the science and art of creating space and setting for a sense of belonging and transformation.
from Cohen’s book:
Key Takeaways “How We Can All Create Belonging”
By staying attuned to these insights, the basis of a situational literacy, we will be better able to engage in this core of practices for building belonging in our daily lives.
1. Ask questions and listen to the answers
Appreciating how much we might discover about people and their circumstances drives curiosity.
In turn, showing genuine curiosity about others is one of the most powerful bond builders. And by getting people’s perspective rather than guessing at it, we are better positioned to provide the support they actually need.
2. Give your perspective
A complement to the need to perspective-get is to perspective-give. Too often we fail to dig intoour views and feelings and to articulate clearly what they are. Sharing more fully, especially ourown stories, can allow others to see us with new eyes.
3. Be civil
The careful use of our words can de-escalate tension and aggressive tendencies. Right speech andwise consul will alleviate conflict.
4. Affirm
One of the most important things a group can do for an individual is to affirm the value and worth of the individual. At its best a group provides situational opportunities for people where they can express who they are and to be valued for it. This should not sound unusual for Unitarian Universalists as this is essentially our first principle; to affirm and promote the worth and dignity of each individual.If a person’s self-esteem is shaky, group affirmation can help the cause.
5. Avoid authoritarian language
Recall that just saying, “I think” before we give our opinions conveys that we understand we are speaking from one point of view and that there may be others. We can openly express our ambivalence on issues, which we’ll have on many important matters.
6. Use the nonverbal channel
Sending nonverbal cues of interest in and respect for others (body language) can be a powerful bonding force:
nodding smiling, leaning in, making eye contact. Letting our nonverbal behavior
accurately express an appropriate enjoyment of the people is generally a good thing.
7. Handle yourself with careNavigating social complexities requires both good headspace and heartspace. If you’re tired, angryor stressed find a means to restore yourself. The more we cultivate our own sense of belonging,the better able we’ll be to nurture it in others.
8. Craft your situations with care
Because who we are is entangled with where we are, we can self-craft by situation-crafting. One way we can craft our daily situation is simply to be a gatekeeper for the multitude of social influences on our own life and the lives of those we care for. Cultivating a rich social life; staying in touch withfamily and friends; finding ways to express our values, such as by devoting ourselves to purposeslarger than ourselves; and striving to be mindful of our own minds through the various psychologicaltimeouts and calisthenics found in this study will all strengthen us in the quest to foster belonging.
Summary:
We can all give and receive help from one another as we seek to strengthen belonging. Though we often fail
to improve things as much as we hope, small gestures and brief experiences of
connection can have surprising effects. We can inspire…
For Women’s History Month
When the Spirit Moves You
BY BELL HOOKS
“I walked further and further away from father and son,” says bell hooks. But my steps always drew me closer to holy spirit.”
In the town I grew up in on hot summer nights when nature was in still repose, it was possible to wander down a narrow unpaved street following the sounds of a tent meeting. It was possible to hear the sounds of voices moved by spirits—voices caught in moments of divine rapture.
As children of a more conservative faith, we were not allowed to attend Pentecostal meetings. I went once. My best friend’s family were all “holy rollers,” as they were often called, and I was allowed to attend with her, even though I was given strict instructions to maintain myself. In other words I was not to allow myself to surrender to the call of divine rapture. I was not to be moved by unseen spirits.
The spirits were there in the tent that night. I could hear and feel them. To my friend who had always attended holiness meetings, there was nothing special or exciting about watching worshippers shout or speak in tongues. But I was mesmerized. Awed to be a witness to mystery. I only saw and heard it once yet the expressions of religious ecstasy and shared rapture stirred my soul. I came away believing more deeply than ever before in a mystical force in the universe—a force that had the power to call us, to touch us with divine spirit.
Everywhere I turned in nature I could see and feel the mystery — the wonder of that which could not be accounted for by human reason.
Baptized as a girl in the church of my upbringing in the “name of the father, the son, and the holy spirit,” I soon became enthralled by the mystical dimensions of religious life. On my way to becoming feminist thinker, writer, and cultural critic I walked further and further away from father and son, but my steps always drew me closer to holy spirit. Its presence could never be rejected or denied. Everywhere I turned in nature I could see and feel the mystery — the wonder of that which could not be accounted for by human reason.
Spirituality has always been the foundation of my experience as a writer. Most writers know that our visions often emerge from places that are mysterious—far removed from who we are and what we think we know. Faced with this reality again and again as we work with words, we can only acknowledge the presence of an unseen force.
Encountering this force was my earliest understanding of what was meant by the evocation of “grace.” In my home church we would sing “grace woke me up this morning, grace started me on my way.” This grace was understood as a recognition of the presence of mystery. We trust from childhood on that we can sleep and wake, that we can rise, that our open eyes will see. For many of us this trust is our covenant with godliness—our appreciation of that mystery of holiness.
Once our daily actions are infused with a sense of the sacred, we hear the rhythms of grace.
In spiritual practice when we learn to be mindfully aware of our actions in everyday life we are essentially learning to practice spiritual vigilance in such a way that we can actually hear the sounds of mystery. Once our daily actions are infused with a sense of the sacred, we hear the rhythms of grace. Like a silent chant those rhythms help steady the mind and bring us peace. If we are listening and moving with these rhythms every action we take—rising out of bed, cleaning ourselves, preparing meals and so forth—reveals to us the sacredness of all life.
Writing has been for me one of the ways to encounter the divine. As a discipline of mind and heart, working with words has become a spiritual practice. Steeped in Christian faith, throughout my young adulthood I would fall on my knees to pray for the “right words”—for an integrity of mind and heart that would lead me to right livelihood in my work with words. Oftentimes I would repeat a prayer that would include the scriptural admonition to “let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable.”
Initially, even though I prayed for divine guidance about my work, I was not really wholeheartedly willing to follow a path that was not in tune with my desires. Ultimately, the conditions of my surrender were not complex: my desires often simply did not work. When I gave myself over to the writing I felt called to do, I experienced fulfillment.
ABOUT BELL HOOKS
bell hooks (1952-2021) described herself as a “Black woman intellectual, revolutionary activist.” A leading cultural critic and thinker about such issues as feminism and race, bell hooks published more than 30 books, including All About Love: New Visions.
Photos from last Saturday’s peace vigil; ban on assault rifles.
There was also a picture and article in this week’s Houlton Pioneer Times
Houlton UUs were well represented!
Dave trying to avoid being struck by traffic…photo by Donna Rich
Walking billboard for “Belonging” theme
(Donna)
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